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From: Kunzite: Re: I need your help

I showed this to Zoisite and he has informed me that nothing is wrong with her phone. So what the dickens does she mean??

hey thi sis cehating

If you won't tell me what she means (and I know that you understand this... gibberish), I have no choice but to ask other people.

I'm not taking any more advice from these people. So I'm going to ask the rest of you; Please tell me, what should I say??

Lord Kunzite, I fear that Venus suffers from the disease of the brain known as chat-speak. Fortunately, most people seem to out grow it eventually.
Unfortunately, it takes some time.
I have found a resource that may be useful, although it is not a complete dictionary. I can link it if you so desire.

However, I have found it similar to translating Egyptian hieroglyphs. The vowels are often missing, as they are not represented in the written format of chat-speak, or the more advanced L337 speak.

Keep in mind the fundamental rule: the user of chat-speak is too lazy to type out the full words. It dates back to when there was a strict and small character limit on text messages.

Good luck sir.


Ask her to meet up
Win your bet
(But feel dirty because it was so easy).

That didn't seem to work.
More to the point, flagrant disregard for vowels does not get me in the mood.

You may find this reseource useful: Internet Slang Dictionary & Translator. It's not 100% foolproof, though, because Minako is a fairly innovative fool who is happy to repurpose common texting slang if she feels it will get across her meaning to anyone able to interpret the language. (Example: this will translate w/ as with, because that's what w/ is used for in English shorthand, but she meant it as what in that second text.)

Consider carefully before deciding to let her know you use this, if you do; she might take it as a sign that you are uncool. Then again, she might find your attempts to understand her charming. It's difficult to predict.

You know, you might do best just to talk about her. Tell her she's pretty (although be aware she may ask what specifically about her you find attractive) or ask about her dreams. I'm sure she'll be able to go on for hours about what a fantastic idol she'll be and how she'll get there.

When in doubt, talk about her!

Ask her about her intrests. Shell go on for hours. And the good thing is you dont have to do a thing. Its a win win stituation.


Try to communicate in this strange language with her.

What did I just say??

Perhaps you should use your eloquent and refined manner of speech. Ask how her day has been, don't be afraid to use complex words! Show her the extent of your diction!

Of course, if you really want to up the ante you can try to beat her at her technology game -- because that's what this is, a game, even if she doesn't realize it. She's likely figured out by now that you aren't following what she's saying and is playing it up.

I recommend the Jargon File for inspiration, even if you don't actually embrace the nerdidity of computer-dom. Especially fun are bogons, quantum bogosity, and the like.

Turnabout is fair play, after all ~

Could go either way

Ask her what she's wearing. :3

That seems promising!

... Oh. I think I'll try changing the subject.

Kunzite, maybe give up?

Or maybe just try saying that you were thinking about her. that always gets a girl going.

Write a text that seems to be meant for someone else. Start some mischief or malicious rumors. Like that Zoi and Ami are meeting secretly perhaps... And then follow it up with, never mind that, I sent it to you by accident. I bet she would buy it and maybe it would distract her for bugging you.

this is a terible idea

The easiest way to handle this is to simply make smalltalk. Though, she might respond if you tell her you are having a hard time understanding what she's typing. Tell her you don't really text much, so text speak is tough for you. I bet she uses better grammar. ;) Venus is alot more intelligent than she lets on.

Ok i had a really good idea. Tell her a rumer that Zoisite has a crush on Ami. And back it up with lies >:}! lies lies lies. Shell try to come up with a plan to set them up. You should be able to out smart her. Then the only thing you have to worrie about is the wrath of Zoisite. So choose what you want ever living head ack Minako or ever living head ack Zoisite.